You will NOT believe how this blog post has come by. I will try to make you. Because that’s the whole point of writing this blog post… besides ratting out a huge egotistic feeling. Don’t worry, you’re not expected to understand any of that. I’m just making a beginning. Yeah.
There’s this great blog I follow. Of course, I’m not giving you the name, because I’m soon going to be very mean and very unethical. So this is me saving face in some roundabout way.
So this great blog I follow is written by a great guy. Obviously. And remember, great does NOT equal good OR bad, and I can vouch for neither. He’s turned in pretty hilarious posts pretty frequently, and that’s how we like bloggers to be. So, what’s wrong?
I liked his writing so much that I wanted to get to talk to him. Silly me. And on the blogging world, you just send a comment through, that’s how you start. I did that. I did that again. Soon I started enjoying his posts so frequently and was commenting all niceties so frequently, that it was like my own little blogging ritual. Yeah, I made all this happen in what, four months in here.
And then suddenly, very VERY suddenly, one nice bright morning (does anyone else see how it is always morning we get these epiphanic rises?) I realised how dumb I was being. Was I really thinking he was reading every one of those words? ALL those months? And who am I kidding? With the follow-ship he has, he probably doesn’t have time for ANY. He must just Approve everything JLT. (Just Like That)
So this is what I did. And yeah, this is where the blog post really begins. Yeah, after five paragraphs of intro. Didn’t you read my bio?
I had my own little personal revenge. Just like my own little personal ritual of reading devotedly and commenting even more enthusiastically. And it was…
I don’t Like you anymore!
Okay, that didn’t work out pretty well. Because my conscience got in the way and I couldn’t even try to badmouth him, because really, this deep ingrained righteousness JUST KEPT shouting how it was always me, and he really didn’t do anything wrong.
Then there were his AMAZING posts, which is why I fell in love with his blog in the first place.
But what I could do was stop commenting UNTIL absolutely necessary. And controlling the clicks on the Like button too. Trust Facebook to make us devout addicts.
That incorrigible man didn’t learn even then.
He KEPT turning in good posts one after the other, one RIGHT after the other.
I learned how fragile a thing ego is. And discovered the maximum boundaries of stupidity. And I had to undo all the plan making and the revenge scheming and see the full bright picture.
Really, what was I thinking? That was so dumb class. Who am I, talking about rights and laws and society when I couldn’t control one stray mistake?
But. But, but. (Whats is it about mistakes that you commit them over and over again and then see the light BUT when the next chance comes, you jump head in again?)
JUST as I was giving myself The Lecture, he published a post. What timing. And… it was bad. Believe me, his FIRST bad post in hundreds. He should get an award or something, for proving he was in fact human. Not the high-order Bot some of us might have mistaken him to be…
But look at this. Here I was teaching myself ethical behaviour. Here he was giving me the Chance of my Life. What do I do?
What do I do?
I take it. I opened The Page, and went through The Post and scrolled down and down… and further down….
and got to the Like button…
and passed it…
and got to the comments…
and passed it..
and Closed Down the Tab.
No Like. No Comment.
My personal little sweeeeet revenge. (For a crime that was mine, yeah.)
End of story.
Disclaimer: I wish I could say this was all fiction. But here comes that righteous pang again, saying in a Mahatma Gandhi voice- Be honest, be frank… and something about living a lie when you can’t be true to yourself. Oh for crying out loud! Okay, this is TRUE! I did it! Happy? What, cuff me! Take me to prison for feeling evil! You know what, take that blogger man along!